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.“Figured you’d think that was gross.”“Hell, me too.” Jay shrugged.“Usually do, only… slightly different orifice.”Landon shoved Jay, making gagging sounds.“Oh, god, please don’t make me think about vaginas right now!”Jay huffed a laugh and returned to kissing Landon.***Jay’s cock was still a semi as they crawled into his bed that night.He didn’t know what had come over him.He became such a fiend around Landon, and things he hadn’t imagined turning him on before got his skin hot and tight.He had never been the type to just hang around after sex, reveling in the naughtiness of it, enjoying the staking of his claim on another person’s body.And damn, didn’t that thought bring him up short.The water shutting off in the bathroom reminded him there was another person who’d sleep in his bed; and that was comforting, for once.Yes, early on in his marriage, he’d loved having another person to touch base with, knowing someone who cared for him, that he cared for, was a constant.But that’d dissipated, certainly in the last four or so years of their marriage.It was officially the first time Landon would stay over with him.Aside from their first hand jobs, Landon had typically gone home later at night, but this time, Jay’d wanted him to stay.Jay still felt a sense of awe at just how different it’d been being with Landon.There wasn’t hours of work just to cum, there was a connection he didn’t even know could exist.He hadn’t gotten what sex could be, other than a pleasant way to spend a bit of time.Tonight, physically, emotionally, he was sated.Even knowing Landon had been filled with Jay had come with its own kinky, but bone-deep satisfaction that was wholly novel to Jay.It was like that back room in his brain, the fluorescent lights weren’t just flickering anymore; whole sections were starting to become completely lit.And Jay’s heart ached with it in good ways and bad.“You okay?” Landon asked, as he came from the bathroom and slid under the covers.He looked at Jay carefully until Jay reached for him and pulled him over, mimicking the first time they’d slept together, Landon’s head on Jay’s shoulder.Jay felt content and sated.For tonight, all he needed was his bed and Landon close by.The rest could wait ‘til morning.A new day, new things to figure out.But Jay wanted to get it right, whatever it was he was doing right now.Even if he didn’t end up with Landon, he wanted to know he’d done the right thing in the end.He was too old to play games, and for both their sakes, he had to really get his head together.He’d probably be wise to go see his counselor in person soon, because he knew Landon didn’t need this being dumped on him since it involved him too.“Jay?”Jay quieted his mind, then looked fondly at Landon.“Thanks for tonight.” He kissed Landon on the forehead.Such a simple thing, but it made Landon look at him like he hung the moon.Yeah, that was definitely all he needed tonight.“Night, Landon.”And easily, they slept.Chapter 15The day, Landon must admit, had been perfect.They’d started early, he and Jay, waking in the same bed, warm and content.After quick handjobs, showers, and a simple breakfast, they’d set to work, finishing up Jay’s deck.The day had been more brisk than the previous, so shirts and hooded sweatshirts stayed on, but that didn’t stop them from subtly finding ways to touch one another.Jay’s surprising affection grew more frequent, as well as his easy, relaxed smile.There was a comfort in their little place, hidden from prying eyes, out in the country.Aside from acting like horny teenagers, they had a light lunch of sandwiches, made small talk, and managed to finish all but the final staining of the wood.The more time Landon spent with Jay, the more a blossom of hope grew in his chest.He knew the real test would come when reality and Jay’s children returned to call, but sitting on the finished deck as the sun disappeared behind the tree-line, sipping coffee, made it hard to stress.Okay, so the seed of doubt existed on the same plot as that blossoming hope [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]