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.“Are you mad?” exclaimed Abram.“We are a family! You are my inheritor.You want to just give that all up?”“There is no more room for the both of us,” said Lot.“This latest problem with our herds is only the tip of the ziggurat.You know that.”He was right.Abram was a fool to think that the young lad with a wandering eye that he had taken with him out of Ur of the Chaldees would be any more satisfied with Abram’s clan than he was with Nahor’s.He was a restless heart and wanted more of the world than he should have.But Abram did not give up too quickly.“Sarai and I will have no children and God promised this land to my seed.You are the nearest kin and I have always thought you would be the one to take on the family name.What if I adopt you now, and grant you firstborn privileges?”Lot could not look at him.It was already too late.Lot had made up his mind.And he certainly did not want to live the nomadic or village life of livestock and agriculture.But he could not bring himself to say it.Abram knew Lot’s heart was back in the city life of Ur, or more recently the city life of exotic and dangerous Egypt.“Uncle, I have always respected and honored you.But I need room to grow my herds and build the life that I want to build, follow my heart, pursue my dreams — not yours.”Abram teared up.He loved his nephew deeply and had poured his heart into mentoring him into a man of El Shaddai.But now, it seemed he had failed, and he was losing his only surrogate for a son.Was El Shaddai’s promise being thwarted? Was it all a big jest?But Abram knew he had lost.He sighed.“Let there be no strife between us.If you must go, then go.The whole land is before you.Choose your inheritance, and I will take the rest.If you go right, I will go left, if you go left, I will go right.”Lot could not believe it.Abram the patriarch of the clan was giving his lowly nephew, the choice.It was yet another example of the kind of love this man had given Lot all his life, and Lot was not going to waste the opportunity.He already knew full well where he wanted to go; the Jordan Valley, that Garden of Eden, that echo of Egypt, and in particular, the location of the five cities of the plain, his redemption.He tried not to sound too excited or give away his strategy, so he faked a casual observation, “Well, I suppose I will go east and you can stay here.You should not be the one to leave.I will cross the Jordan and find my way.”“Travel on the west side of the Salt Sea,” said Abram.“It is an easier trek to Sodom and Gomorrah.”Lot flinched.Abram knew exactly what he was up to.He could not hide a thing from the man who took care of him all these years.And yet, he could hear a soul wrenching pain in Abram’s words.Lot was breaking Abram’s heart.But there was nothing he could do.He heard the cities calling him.It was his destiny.An exciting new world of unknown experiences.Sarai was suffering a bout of depression, or as she called it, a malady of sadness.It had been five or so years since they first left Mesopotamia to become nomads in this unruly land.She had married Abram and had followed him and his vision with her whole heart.She believed in him and he adored her.Even the incident in Egypt did not sway her faith in El Shaddai and grace for her husband.While Abram’s clan was sojourning in Egypt to escape the famine in Canaan, the Pharaoh had noticed Sarai and wanted her to be one of his concubines.But Abram feared that if Pharaoh discovered she was his wife, he would have Abram killed to take her for himself.So Abram remembered Nimrod’s comments before the fiery furnace and commanded Sarai to tell him she was Abram’s sister.Which was technically half-true.She was his half-sister.She dutifully obeyed and Pharaoh took her into his court for future consummation.As a bride price, Abram received from Pharaoh much of the wealth they now enjoyed: Servants, animals, and silver and gold.All of which, Abram felt guilty for.But he could not reveal the truth for fear of his life.El Shaddai sent plagues upon the Pharaoh in return.When Pharaoh discovered the real reason for the diseases, he returned Sarai into Abram’s keeping, chastised him, and sent them back to Canaan.Sarai knew her husband and his weaknesses, his sins, but loved him anyway.He was a man of such confidence and faith, who would have lapses of trust and seek to control events for his own benefit.Even though El Shaddai had promised him his seed would inherit the land of Canaan, he sometimes felt that he had to manage things on his own because El Shaddai did not seem to be following through.It only and always resulted in pain for them both.But Sarai knew she had her own weaknesses and lapses of trust as well.If El Shaddai had promised Abram a seedline, then why would he make Sarai barren?Her childlessness continued to eat at her soul.She would see other mothers with their infants or playful children around them and feel a deep pain of grief in her heart.She felt as if she was nothing.She had no purpose, no meaning to her life.Of course, she loved her husband with every part of her heart, liver, and intestines, and he was all she had in this world, so she clung to him with a fierce devotion despite the uncertainties and suffering.But that was only the half of it.The Bedouin lifestyle of tent dwelling and constant living on the move was wearing her down with loneliness and despair.She had been raised in a sophisticated life back in Ur and Mesopotamia.But in a Bedouin camp, there are no markets nearby to shop on a daily basis, no long-term close neighbors with which to share her thoughts, no roots from which to draw stability.And the tents were like living in poverty compared to city houses.In the city, the mud brick homes kept a cool temperature in summer and warmth in the winter.Tents on the other hand were made of goatskins that barely provided a comfortable shade in summer and barely kept the winds at bay in winter [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]